Q: What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A: A carrot!
Q: What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert?
A: I-scream!
Q: Why did the skeleton go to the party alone?
A: He had no body to go with!
Q: What’s brown and sticky?
A: A stick!
Q: Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A: They’re afraid to unwind!
Q: What do you call fake spaghetti?
A: An impasta!
Q: What’s a witch’s favorite subject in school?
A: Spelling!
Q: Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
A: They don’t have the guts!
Q: What do ghosts use to wash their hair?
A: Shamboo!
Q: Why did the vampire read the newspaper?
A: He heard it had great circulation!
Q: What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A: A thesaurus!
Q: What do you call a sleeping bull?
A: A bulldozer!
Q: What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?
A: Try-try-try-ceratops!
Q: What kind of key opens a haunted house?
A: A spoo-key!
Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
A: Frostbite!
Q: What did one wall say to the other wall?
A: I’ll meet you at the corner!
Q: Why did the ghost go into the bar?
A: For the boos!
Q: What kind of room has no doors or windows?
A: A mushroom!
Q: What’s a zombie’s favorite bean?
A: A human bean!
Q: What do you call a funny mountain?
A: Hill-arious!
Q: Why don’t ghosts like rain?
A: It dampens their spirits!
Q: What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A: A blood orange!
Q: Why did the pumpkin cross the road?
A: To get to the other patch!
Q: What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room?
A: The living room!
Q: What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
A: Nacho cheese!
Q: What’s a mummy’s favorite type of music?
A: Wrap music!
Q: Why did the scarecrow win an award?
A: He was outstanding in his field!
Q: What’s a ghost’s favorite ride at the fair?
A: The roller-ghoster!
Q: What did the big flower say to the little flower?
A: Hi, bud!
Q: Why did the chicken join a band?
A: Because it had drumsticks!
Q: What do you get when you cross a black cat and a lemon?
A: A sour-puss!
Q: What’s a witch’s favorite pet?
A: A broom-stick!
Q: What do skeletons say before eating?
A: Bone-appétit!
Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A: A gummy bear!
Q: Why are ghosts bad liars?
A: Because they’re too transparent!
Q: What’s a vampire’s favorite ship?
A: A blood vessel!
Q: What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?
A: You’d think it’s R, but it’s the C!
Q: What did one eye say to the other eye?
A: Between us, something smells!
Q: What’s a ghoul’s favorite game?
A: Hide and shriek!
Q: Why don’t monsters eat ghosts?
A: They taste like sheet!
Q: What do you call a skeleton that stays up all night?
A: Lazy bones!
Q: What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?
A: A chili dog on a bun!
Q: Why did the zombie go to school?
A: He wanted to improve his dead-ucation!
Q: What kind of mistakes do ghosts make?
A: Boo-boos!
Q: What kind of pants does a ghost wear?
A: Boo-jeans!
Q: What do you call two witches sharing an apartment?
A: Broom-mates!
Q: Why did the vampire need mouthwash?
A: Because he had bat breath!
Q: What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument?
A: The trom-bone!
Q: What do you call a fish that wears a crown?
A: King Neptune!
Q: What did the vampire say to his date?
A: You look fang-tastic!
Q: Why did the ghost go to school?
A: To improve his haunting skills!
Q: What do you call a dinosaur who loves to dance?
A: A boogie-saurus!
Q: What did one plate say to the other plate?
A: Dinner’s on me!
Q: Why did the pumpkin sit alone?
A: It didn’t have the guts to mingle!
Q: What’s a monster’s favorite play?
A: Romeo and Ghouliet!
Q: What kind of makeup do ghosts wear?
A: Mas-scare-a!
Q: What do you call a sleeping dinosaur?
A: A dino-snore!
Q: Why do skeletons hate winter?
A: It’s bone-chilling!
Q: Why was the math book sad?
A: It had too many problems!
Q: What’s a vampire’s favorite candy?
A: Suckers!
Q: What’s a ghost’s favorite food?
A: Ghoul-ash!
Q: What kind of music do mummies like most?
A: Wrap music!
Q: Why do witches fly on brooms?
A: Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy!
Q: What’s a ghost’s favorite color?
A: Boo-green!
Q: What kind of shoes do ghosts wear?
A: Boo-ts!
Q: What’s a skeleton’s favorite snack?
A: Spare ribs!
Q: Why don’t zombies eat comedians?
A: They taste funny!
Q: What do you call a scared vampire?
A: A bat-chicken!
Q: Why did the ghost bring a ladder to the bar?
A: To reach the top shelf boos!
Q: What’s a witch’s favorite time of day?
A: The bewitching hour!
Q: What kind of dog does Dracula have?
A: A bloodhound!
Q: Why was the broom late?
A: It swept in!
Q: What do you call a haunted chicken?
A: A poultry-geist!
Q: What kind of tie does a ghost wear to a party?
A: A boo-tie!
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road?
A: To get to the body shop!
Q: What’s a monster’s favorite dessert?
A: I-scream sandwiches!
Q: What kind of cars do zombies drive?
A: Monster trucks!
Q: Why did the ghost go on a diet?
A: Too many spiritual calories!
Q: What’s a pumpkin’s favorite sport?
A: Squash!
Q: Why was the graveyard so noisy?
A: Because of all the coffin!
Q: What’s a ghoul’s favorite fruit?
A: Boo-berries!
Q: What did Dracula say to the mirror?
A: Long time no see!
Q: What kind of baby does a mummy have?
A: A wrap-around!
Q: Why do vampires always look so pale?
A: Because their blood runs cold!
Q: What kind of monster is the best dancer?
A: The boogie man!
Q: What’s a witch’s favorite drink?
A: Brewed coffee!
Q: What’s a ghost’s favorite place to shop?
A: The boo-tique!
Q: Why was the jack-o-lantern afraid?
A: It had no guts!
Q: What do ghosts eat for breakfast?
A: Boo-berries and scream!
Q: What’s a mummy’s favorite vacation spot?
A: The Dead Sea!
Q: Why did the vampire need art lessons?
A: To learn how to draw blood!
Q: What’s a monster’s favorite kind of cereal?
A: Count Chocula!
Q: Why don’t skeletons ever go trick-or-treating alone?
A: They don’t have the heart!
Q: What do you get when you drop a pumpkin?
A: Squash!
Q: What’s a ghost’s favorite candy?
A: Boo-ble gum!
Q: What’s a witch’s favorite subject in school?
A: Hex-tra credit!
Q: Why did the skeleton go to the party?
A: To lift his spirits!
Q: What did one ghost say to the other?
A: Do you believe in people?
Q: What’s a vampire’s favorite meal?
A: Stake and potatoes!
Q: What do you call a dinosaur who can’t stop talking?
A: A blabber-odon!
Q: What’s a pumpkin’s favorite weather?
A: Smashing!
Q: Why did the zombie bring a pencil to class?
A: To draw blood!
Q: What do you call a skeleton who won’t get up?
A: Lazy bones!
Q: Why did the ghost refuse to go to bed?
A: He wasn’t tired—just dead!
Q: What’s a mummy’s favorite flower?
A: A tulip—because it wraps up nicely!
Q: What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument?
A: The xyl-bone!
Q: Why was the ghost a great cheerleader?
A: Because she had lots of spirit!
Q: Why did the skeleton go surfing?
A: He caught the wave of the afterlife!
Q: What’s a vampire’s favorite dog?
A: A bloodhound!
Q: What did the ghost say to the bee?
A: Boo-bee!
Q: What’s a scarecrow’s favorite fruit?
A: Straw-berries!
Q: What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A: Ice scream!
Q: Why did the skeleton fail art class?
A: He didn’t have the guts to draw!
Q: What kind of cereal do zombies eat?
A: Rice Creepies!
Q: What’s a ghost’s favorite instrument?
A: The boo-gle!
Q: Why don’t mummies ever get invited to parties?
A: Because they’re too wrapped up in themselves!
Q: What’s a pumpkin’s favorite accessory?
A: A gourd-geous smile!
Q: What’s a witch’s favorite holiday?
A: Hex-giving!
Q: What’s a ghost’s favorite social media app?
A: Boo-Tok!
Q: Why did the skeleton stay calm?
A: Nothing gets under his skin!
Q: What’s a bat’s favorite subject in school?
A: Algebra—lots of fangtions!
Q: What’s a pumpkin’s favorite fairy tale?
A: Cinderella!
Q: Why did the mummy join the orchestra?
A: He had great wrap-tempo!
Q: What’s a ghost’s favorite movie?
A: The Invisible Man!
Q: What’s a witch’s favorite sport?
A: Batminton!
Q: Why did the vampire get a job at the hospital?
A: To draw blood!
Q: What’s a ghost’s favorite drink?
A: Boo-berry smoothie!
Q: What’s a skeleton’s favorite plant?
A: Bone-sai tree!
Q: What’s a zombie’s favorite type of music?
A: Heavy metal—lots of head-banging!
Q: What’s a vampire’s favorite type of dog?
A: A bloodhound!
Q: What do ghosts do when they get in an elevator?
A: Raise their spirits!
Q: Why was the zombie a terrible liar?
A: You could see right through him!
Q: What do ghosts wear when it rains?
A: Boo-ts and ghoul-oshes!
Q: What kind of bug do ghosts love?
A: Spook-tacles!
Q: What’s a pumpkin’s favorite type of joke?
A: A corny one!